Harikesa "Prabhu" - Guide Us!
[PADA: Originally posted in 1998.]
BY YOUR FORMER "DISCIPLES
Dear Harikesa "Prabhu", please accept our respect. All glories to Srila Prabhupada.
We are confused - please help us resolve these questions? You say you didn't want to be a Spiritual Master anymore, that you just wanted to be a "guide". Can you please guide us through this time of confusion? Can you guide us through the following questions?
You say that Srila Prabhupada tricked you into taking sannyasa. Why did you then write for Satsvarupa's Lilamrta that you asked Srila Prabhupada to give you sannyasa and he refused. And only after you begged and convinced Srila Prabhupada that your godbrothers would not let you give class in the temples, he agreed to give you sannyasa?
You say that "you were not into the guru trip". If that is true, why did you order your godbrothers to fan you on the Vyasasana the day you came back from India with your guru title? You say that in 1977 the GBC members went to Sridhar Maharaja and came back with his advise as you put it:
"Oh when you are a guru it's like being married, right? You have your wife and wife means home or children, family. You have to have your own home, your own place, right? And guru, you know, you should have Vyasasana which is just a little bit below Srila Prabhupada's Vyasasana", and so many things. And he destroyed everything by saying that."
Why did you not follow his advise and get your own place? Why did you instead throw out most of your godbrothers to make room for you and your disciples to worship you? Is it possible that you didn't have the potency to start your own preaching, but instead had to steal the preaching success of your godbrothers, claim it to be yours, and then ban your godbrothers from the temples they had created? Didn't you destroy everything by not following that advise?
Why did you go to Sweden and throw Vegavan out of the temple, who had started the preaching in Sweden long before you even knew where Sweden was? Why did you use the very radio station that Vegavan had established to preach the glories of Srila Prabhupada and Lord Chaitanya to smear him over the airwaves and call him a demon? Why did you publicly encourage your disciples to threaten Vegavan's live?
Why did you tell publicly that it was "a great thing" for your disciples to threaten your godbrothers, who disagreed with you? You say: "It was really hard that you could not talk to anyone (about the guru issue)" Why is it then that you kicked everyone out of your zone who was trying to talk to you about this?
Why did you kick some of your godbrothers out of your zone just for attending a meeting of Srila Prabhupada disciples in Harivilasa's house in Paris in 1984, who met there to talk about this issue?
Why did you expel some of your godbrothers from your zone and then personally called other zones to prevent these godbrother from serving in ISKCON there? Why did you declare in 1981 that if anyone wanted to initiate disciples in your zone it would be "over your dead body?"
Why did you tell your godbrothers in Europe that "they could consider themselves fortunate to take birth in their next life as an American."? Why did you ban all marriages for European devotees in your zone for many years while offering any American devotee, who would travel through your zone "any girl they would pick" for marriage? Were you a racists at that time?
You complain that ISKCON devotee are so cruel and impersonal! Why did you then manage to sell the house belonging to one of your disciple's mother, while she was still living in it, with the help of your ISKCON lawyers and some legal trickery, to build your "rock-and-roll" studio in Sweden for $150,000 Dollars? Did you not feel any shame when doing this?
Why did you not stop making your "techno-music" even though the GBC had ordered you many times to stop making such music, which some of your godbrothers described as sounding like "an Elephant having a miscarriage"? Why did you engage many of your disciples in selling millions of these "rock-and-roll" records when these had no preaching value? Why did you decide in 1984 to make all your decisions as GBC for the Northern European countries by swinging a pendulum over a weejee-board? Why did you perform such ridiculous activities during leadership meetings in your zone.
Why did you tell your godbrothers in 1984 that you had the power to kill anyone on this planet by some new age "woodoo" practice? Why did you tell your godbrothers in 1984 that you had invented the "perpetual motion machine". Why did you engage your disciples in such work to build such a contraption almost killing one of your disciples, when such contraption exploded, ripping half of this disciple's hand off.
Why did you spend hundreds of thousands of dollars trying to build a flying saucer? Why did you tell your godbrothers that you were planning to build a flying saucer landing platform on your Mayapur building, to be used for landing your "UFO"? Why did you try to have your godbrother Bhakti Dayal Swami assassinated after he could no longer accept you as a GBC due to all this. Where in Srila Prabhupada's books or any other vedic literature is it mentioned that Vaishnava should consult a Pendulum or a Weejee-board to make decisions?
Why did you tell your disciples in Hungary that they would not get any karma if they murdered Bhakti Dayal Swami? Why did you order Devamrita Swami and Gurugauranga to record a tape to be distributed to all your disciples in Hungary, giving them the order to murder Bhakti Dayal Swami and there would not be any reaction for this?
Why did you send your men to break into Bhakti Dayal Swami's temples in Vienna and Hungary, to interrogate his followers and steal the multiple false passports he was using to preach in the communist countries. Why did you turn these false passports over to the Russian KGB? What did you want the KGB to do with Bhakti Dayal Swami for you? Did you or the KGB have anything to do with the "car accident" in which Bhakti Dayal Swami died shortly after that?
Why did you state, from the Vyasasana, that you never made any predictions about a 3rd world war coming, even though all your disciples had heard these things from you for years with their own ears? Did you know that some of your disciples quit their jobs and sold all their belongings to camp out in their basements in 1982 in anticipation of a 3rd world war that you had predicted?
Why did you rewrite all of Srila Prabhupada's purports of the 5th Canto Srimad Bhagavatam to be published by your BBT, to replace Srila Prabhupada's edition of the 5th Canto? Why did you never publish it? Why were you the only one to vote against allowing more than 11 "acaryas" to initiate disciples in New Vrindavan in 1985? Why did you vote to reinstate Bhavananda, even though you knew he was having sexual relations with other men and his own disciples? Did you think at that time this was the behavior of a "Vaishnava"?
Why, as his secretary, did you tell Srila Prabhupada in Vrindavan "to clean up his own mess"? Why did Srila Prabhupada fire you after that? Why did Srila Prabhupada reject food cooked by you in 1977 in Paris by saying: "This food was cooked by a demon."? Why did you take mind-altering drugs for a decade even though you knew that it was against one of the Vaishnava principles to get intoxicated?
You complain that the dealings amongst ISKCON devotees were so heartless. If so, why did you make a rule in Argentina that devotees could not touch, embrace or pay obeisances to each other? Why did you throw out one of your senior godbrothers because he said that you were "not a loving spiritual master for your disciples."?
You complain that there was no loving, trusting relationship between husbands and wifes in ISKCON. Then why did you arrange marriages for some of your disciples, and then instruct the wife to spy on her husband and report to you? Why did you say from the Vyasasana before the deities: "If I see a devotee girl looking for a husband, I offer her my foot."
Is it possible that the devotees had more loving and caring relationships before you introduced your "fascist" sannyasa management style in Europe, after pushing out Hansadutta from Europe by complaining to Srila Prabhupada that "everything was so mismanaged there?"
You complain that ISKCON had become a "dangerous cult"! What kept you from making ISKCON in your zone a better place? Certainly the GBC had no means of keeping you from doing that, you never followed any of the GBC's orders. Your godbrothers could not have kept you from doing it, since you forced all of them out, who disagreed with you in any way. So what kept you from making ISKCON the better place, since you knew all along how terrible it all was?
Why did you concoct your own version of the BBT and the refused to sell Srila Prabhupada's books to certain devotees? Why could you not work with the BBT that Srila Prabhupada created, according to his plans? Why did you try to steal the copyrights to Srila Prabhupada's books from the BBT and dismantle the BBT that Srila Prabhupada had created by orchestrating a monstrous law suit which has cost ISKCON over one Million dollars? Was it because you never could work with anyone that was not your slave?
Why did you encourage your disciples to gamble in the Russian Stock market where they lost 20 Million dollars of ISKCON and BBT money, even though Srila Prabhupada had clearly advised all his disciples that such investments should never be done with ISKCON or BBT money?
Why did you throw out hundreds of devotees in the street with not a penny in their pockets after they had served ISKCON sometimes for a decade, sometimes collected a fortune for ISKCON and ruined their health going on sankirtan for many years? Why did you push your "sankirtan devotees" to the point of suicide, only to discard them later when they became "useless", and you would say: "He has never done anything for Srila Prabhupada."?
Why did you demand to be handed over Millions and accepting $500,000 dollars for your "services" after falling down with a "prostitute"? Why did you try to sell your gross fall down with one of your disciples and later with a "karmi" woman as some sort of transcendental affair? Do you not know any Vaishnava philosophy?
Adding up all the expenses related to your guruship and position, the $100,000 Mercedes cars, Million dollar motor home, expensive apartment flats all over Europe, air line tickets can easily add up to Millions of dollars that you have cost ISKCON. Do you think your services were that valuable?
Have you considered that receiving the $500,000 would nullify all your devotional service you have done all these years, converting it into "fruitive activity", like the "karmis" do when they work for money? Will your disciples be cheated out of their devotional service, having served all these years a "karmi", who worked all these years for a salary?
Did you know that some of your "disciples" that have collected much of this money over the last decades are considering suing ISKCON for this money, feeling cheated out of their devotional service? Don't you know that offering something to brahmanas for free and then later charge money for it a very sinful thing? Do you know that story of the King who became a lizard?
And last but not least, why are you now comparing Srila Prabhupada to Hitler? What does Srila Prabhupada have in common with Hitler for you to make such statements? Isn't it more correct that you are like Hitler, who is now complaining about the cruelty of the NAZI party?
One more question: What ashram are you currently in? You are currently not in the grihasta ashram, not in the varnaprasta ashram, certainly not in the Brahmacari or Sannyasa ashram... Could it be that you are back in the "Mleccha Ashram" that Srila Prabhupada had saved you from 20-some years ago?
Do you think that this is the behavior of a Vaishnava? Are you still a devotee of Krishna? Were you ever a devotee of Lord Krishna and the Vaishnavas at any point in your life, or did you just stay in ISKCON for all these years for the opportunity and the luxury lifestyle?
Were you not in fact one of the chief engineers who turned Srila Prabhupada's wonderful dream into the nightmare it has become for many. We appreciate your patience to listen to all our questions.
What is your response to these questions? You say you want to be a "guide". Then please guide us through these difficult questions. Guide us to the proper understanding of how you have been victimized by ISKCON and Srila Prabhupada, so we can properly feel sorry for you?
And one more question. You seem to be in search of "happiness" these days. Do you really think you can find happiness in this world or in the next without sincerely seeking forgiveness from all the devotees that you have severely offended over the last decades?
We anxiously await your answers to these questions.
Your former "disciples"
P.S. Srila Prabhupada said: "One blind man leads another blind man, they both fall into the ditch."